The Journey Begins...
For me personally, I started at a pretty low point and had a long way to go. I remember throwing up before my first night out to a popular bar in my area because I was so scared of entering that environment and talking to women. The only natural advantage I seemed to muster up at that point in my life was courage. I gathered up as much of it as I could and got ready to embark on the toughest journey I’ve ever been on.
I jumped into my transformation headfirst and started to change everything about myself over the next year. I cut my hair, got contacts, wore earrings and jewelry, bought all new clothes, and even lost over 100 pounds in the first year of my transformation. I changed so much that my only two best friends of over 10 years completely disappeared (haven't seen or talked to them since) because they couldn’t handle how much I changed. Even my own family thought I was crazy. I absolutely was. I became obsessed with transforming myself not only on the outside but on the inside. I wasn’t a fat guy anymore, and I was determined not to be a lonely one, either.
I was a sponge for knowledge. I didn’t just dabble in self-improvement advice, I jumped head first into it. I devoured all the knowledge I could until I was an expert on a subject, and then I went back for seconds. In my early twenties learning the skill-set to attract women into my life became my obsession.
I remember a typical day for me 7 years ago...
- 8am - On the way to work I would listen to audio books in my car
- 9am - During the first half of my work day I would have my earbuds in listening to more audio books on picking up girls (I got a labor job so I could listen to music while I worked)
- 12pm - At lunch time I would read and memorize lists of stories I had prepared to talk to women about
- 1pm - During the second half of my workday and the drive home, more audio books
- 5pm - I would hit the gym after work, then go home and watch videos on picking up girls
- 7pm - My wingman would come over and we would recite our stories out loud to each other for a couple hours before we drove to a bar or club
- 9pm - We would spend 3-4 hours at the club approaching and talking to as many girls as possible
- 1am - On the drive home we’d break down our nights, then I would go home and write in my journal for an hour
Sleep and repeat the next day. (I would often go out to meet girls 7 nights a week at this time and many other times over the last 9 years)
I was utterly and completely obsessed. I did whatever it took to ensure I would never be alone again.
I couldn’t even sleep most nights because my mind was racing so rapidly from all the stimulation. Despite all of my efforts, it took me a very long time to start seeing any tangible results. Back at the time I was doing most of my research, the tactics and techniques that I was studying were not very effective. I was told to dress outlandishly, talk about things I had absolutely no interest in, and I was pretty much acting like a robot when talking to girls.
There was a time I clearly remember when I had approached a group of three girls at a local bar on a Friday night. I asked them a question, ignored their responses, and started to go into one of my pre-scripted stories about some unrelated topic that I had memorized. As I was talking to the three girls at the same time, one of them says out loud to her friend, “Is this guy a newscaster or something?” I sounded so mechanical that they felt like they were watching a guy on TV. Of course I didn’t know how to handle that and I stuck to my script until they walked away laughing in the next few seconds.
You have to be very careful of the advice you take from people. I wasted a good amount of my time following the wrong guidance. If I would have sought out the right advice from someone who had been through the same thing I had and knew how to get real world results, it would have saved me a lot of time, pain, and frustration back in the day.
Learning as directly as you can from the right person, someone who can get and reproduce the results you desire, is one of the most important lessons that I learned in my journey.
I tried to do the best I could with what I had available to me at the time. My start was slow, but eventually I stumbled into a few golden strategies that skyrocketed my success out of nowhere.